When the Past Finds Its Way Into the Present

There are moments when the past finds its way into the present.
Recently, something painful from my childhood resurfaced, and for a moment, I felt overwhelmed. It was as though I had gone back in time. For those few moments, what happened long ago felt very close again.
But something was different this time.
I didn't abandon myself.
Instead of trying to run from what I was feeling, I stayed. I allowed myself to sit with the pain, the fear, and the anxiety. Mindfulness helped bring me back to myself and reminded me of something I could not have known as a little girl: I am not that little girl anymore.
I have knowledge now. I have a voice. I have the ability to protect myself. And I have learned that the calm I search for doesn't always have to come from somewhere outside of me. There is a place of calm within me that I can return to.
So I stayed with myself.
And in the middle of everything I was feeling, I offered myself love.
Something began to shift. Not quickly. Not forcefully. But slowly and gently, I found myself moving into a space of grace.
Witnessing that shift gave me courage. It gave me comfort. And it reminded me that if the past finds its way into my present again, I know something now that I didn't know before:
I don't have to leave myself to survive the moment.
There was also a little girl inside of me who had once been frightened and unable to understand what was happening to her. By staying present with myself, I felt as though I was finally able to offer her some of the safety, tenderness, and love she needed then.
After sitting with everything through mindfulness, I moved into meditation.
If mindfulness helped me remain with myself during the storm, meditation gave me somewhere to rest after it.
And when I came out of that stillness, I understood something deeply human.
Our experiences become part of our story. And sometimes, when something from the past returns, the moment can also become an opportunity to meet ourselves with something we may not have had before—awareness, compassion, wisdom, or love.
I came away from this experience realizing that there is still so much for me to discover about myself.
And rather than frightening me, that realization leaves me in awe.
Because every time I discover another place within myself that needs my presence, I am also discovering another place where love can enter.
And somehow, I find myself coming home to myself again.